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Is mindset a buzzword?

May 14, 2020


Mindset seems to be a buzzword that most coaches use.


But what is mindset – Mindset is defined as the established set of attitudes held by someone.

You see, up until a few years ago, I was just living life as it was, building a business, seeing clients doing what I do. I was happy but was I living life to my true values and purpose – probably not.

Then I embarked on my journey of personal development and boy did I uncover things I didn’t even know existed in my brain. Neuroscience and the way the brain works is remarkable.

Mindset can be divided into two groups, fixed or growth. Those with a fixed mindset have limiting beliefs, they are stuck in their ways and usually don’t like change. Where those with a growth mindset, embrace change, love to learn and see failure as an experience from which they have learnt.

Having a strong and open mindset allows us to work towards our goals, but our mind loves to play tricks on us and things can come up which get in the way of us achieving our goals.

What happens is that we get all excited and set a goal. We start on our journey towards success and achieving our goal and the first thing that happens is our limiting beliefs try to stop us. Our limiting beliefs are small insults we like to throw at ourselves, telling ourselves that we are not good enough, or that we can’t do this and why are we even bothering.

Imagine we are on the roadmap to success, we are driving along, and a limiting belief hits us, we stop the car. Now, many people just stop here, turn the car around and go back to the same old. But what you have to do is jump back in the car and know that those beliefs are not true, they are just insults you are throwing at yourself and what your feeling is uncomfortable at the thought of trying something new. Our limiting beliefs want to keep us safe. Now if it was comfortable you would just have driven straight through and not had to stop. So you have to get back in the car, navigate through those limiting beliefs and continue on your journey to achieving your goal.

So we jump back in the car and continue driving towards our destination - our goal. We begin to dream of all the fantastic things that will happen when we reach our goal and the next thing that gets in the way is our trapped emotions. It's like a small child sitting in the back of the car just crying for no reason. We feel scared, anxious, we basically start to emotionally blackmail ourselves. So once again we stop the car and some people without a strong mindset will not be able to work through the trapped emotions and will just stop there and then, turn around and go back. But if you can navigate yourself or with help from others through these trapped emotions, then you can get back in the car and back on your journey to achieving your goals.

Now you are in the final leg of your journey towards your destination of achieving your goal, you can see the big picture. What comes into play now is your intelligence. You start to have conflicting values, should I do this or that, you become indecisive and not being able to make those final decisions. Again you stop the car on the side of the road and if it's all too hard to make those decisions then you end up just stopping there and not being able to achieve your goal. But if you can work through those conflicting values and make the decisions your success is only a short distance away, you can see it and feel it.

When you start working on your mindset and through the sabotaging behaviours that are stopping you from living your best life, your life starts to transform in front of your eyes. You understand why you do the things you do and what is stopping you from achieving your goals. You start to live your life with purpose and understand your why of doing things.

In our brain, we have very complex neural networks. We have neurons which are “brain cells” that transmit information. These cells are not like normal cells that divide and die off. They stay there forever. A process called myelination insulates these cells and the more you do something, the more myelination occurs and makes the process effortless for you to do. When you start to learn new behaviours and ways of doing things, it can be uncomfortable and hard, but once you keep on repeating the same behaviours and the myelination increases. It becomes easy and second nature to you, that’s why you have to keep going. You have to develop a growth mindset, one that is open to learning, is curious and wants to know more. Only then will you be able to continually achieve your goals and build a life that you love to live.

I am one that has always had a growth mindset, but until I was able to work through my limiting beliefs, trapped emotions and conflicted values I was nowhere near as happy, content or successful on my journey towards my goals. I now understand my why, purpose and passion which are aligned and I’m building my best life. 


Fairien x


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